


I can't quit you

by robinscherbatskys



Category: The Voice RPF
Genre: Adam is a sad little puppy and I want to curl him up in a blanket this is AWFUL, Angst, Based on Season 8, M/M, One Shot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-11
Updated: 2015-03-11
Packaged: 2018-03-17 05:45:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,126
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3517634
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/robinscherbatskys/pseuds/robinscherbatskys
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Adam needs him like a poet needs the pain.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I can't quit you

"Blake, is everything okay?"

It was just another session on the sets of The Voice with the shooting of the blinds, except Adam had a sick feeling in his stomach. And he'd be lying if it didn't have something to do with his country-singing fellow coach.

Everything was going alright as far as he could remember. The other day Blake even cuddled him, laying a peck on his forehead as the camera focused on them. He didn't stop even after Adam told him he smelled like deer. That couldn't be it could it? The fact that he actually considered that to be the cause of problems in their relationship made him feel pathetic. Adam's been way more creative than that with his insults.

The thing is Blake's started seeming distant for a while now. He doesn't turn to look at him during the auditions like he used to, and when he does he seems... unresponsive. He’s not been able to catch up with him backstage or his trailer either, leaving Adam alone or caught with one of the other judges. He didn’t do anything to hurt Blake did he? He found himself constantly going over things he’s said and his behavior in recent times, trying to analyze and figure out what might have pissed off Blake to torture him with the whole passive aggressive act.

"Yeah it’s cool. Let's get going shall we?" Blake said, nonchalantly sipping his drink, not even giving him the privilege of looking at his face. Adam stared at the bigger man’s back as they made their way to the stage, still not quite buying it. 

____________________________________________________

Adam was having an awful run, he was losing all the good artists and Blake's attitude and its after effects simply distracted him further from the task at hand.

"First of all between's Blake boots, Pharrell's jewelry and Christina's attitude... where am I in this occasion here?"

"Nowhere" Blake promptly replied as the room roared with laughter. What the fuck was even going on anymore? Adam felt like a little kid but it did kind of crush him. He shouldn't be taking Blake's insult to heart, but he truly was feeling left out today. 

At one point when the other 3 judges had turned their chairs around, Adam kept his back turned, listening closely to the lyrics.

_"But if you loved me, why’d you leave me, take my body…"_

He stared longingly at Blake, wishing his boyfriend would just turn to look at him with a smile, asking him to push his button or just show some kind of familiar gesture to put his thoughts to rest. His mind was racing as he looked at the country star, bobbing his head to the singer, getting into the music. He noticed Christina and Pharrell grooving along, and suddenly his heart sank. Where'd his spirit go? Did Blake kill him with a bit of ignorance? Was that the kind of power he had over Adam?

His confidence was being dragged through the mud. Even the contestants weren't giving him a break today. "I'm an idiot, I know that" he said lightly as the artist snapped him with an "I agree". The merciless laughter took over and it was as loud as ever to his ears. He saw the other judges chuckling themselves to death with Christina and Blake even giving the guy a standing ovation. He saw Blake laughing, wondering if that's what he was to him. Nothing but a useless joke, only good for a laugh. He hated that his bad days would never have their ups and downs. It was literally all downs. He felt like the whole universe was against him, all alone.  

Blake's words just stung him more and more as the day went on. After more unsuccessful attempts to snag artists, Adam needed to take a fucking chill pill and get his head back in the game. "It doesn't add up. None of this adds up" he said worriedly about the competition. 

"You know where you screwed up? When you started talking." Blake stated.

That was it. Adam couldn't take it anymore, he felt like he was at breaking point. He got off his seat with a sigh. "I need to take a break. You just broke my heart" he made his way out but decided to stop at Blake's seat. He wanted to put out some positive vibes for the cameras despite feeling like absolute shit. Last thing he needed was the audience feeling the tension that was pricking him all over. Ignoring Blake's "what?" and his defensive hands, he leaned in and planted two affectionate kisses on his cheeks. He gave Blake a chastely short yet passionately fierce look, close and hard right in the eyes. "Are they making out again?" Christina asked getting some laughs out of the audience. That was enough for Adam, he just needed them to feel good. He slowly walked off feeling battered and bruised. He was back in trailer, trying not to cry. He knew people would start asking questions if he walked out there with red eyes and dried tears on his face. He was weak and broken, and he just needed to come to terms with it and get through it alone. He lay down for a few minutes, clutching his head, trying to ease the headache. This was so not his fucking day.

____________________________________________________

"I hope your personality changes with all this fame. It can't get worse, it can only get better." Blake said, looking cold and hard in the eyes. Adam looked like a kicked puppy, part hurt and part intrigued, leaning back on his table to hear more. Let's hear what he has to say. Let's hear this 6'4" heart breaker let it all out. Just walk all over him. 

"You started out as an asshole, maybe you'll turn into a good guy" he spewed as Christina laughed. It was just another of their antics for her after all. But why didn't it feel that way for Adam. He tried to think of something to say in return, something cocky, something sweet... just anything at all that might get Blake to come back and give him one of those stupid bear hugs he missed so much. The ones he'd always pretended to hate but secretly couldn't get enough of. But right now, everything wasn't so sunshiney anymore. The country singer got up from his seat muttering "asshole!" as he proceeded to go backstage. Adam snapped out of his melancholic state of mind as he heard the audience awww-ing as they watched him sit in silence as his friend disappeared. He gave them a warm look, trying to get the jovial atmosphere back in the room. "He doesn't mean it!" he told them, laughing and feeling relieved as they laughed back. But who was he trying to convince when he said that... The spectators or his stupid, needy heart?

The time passed and he still couldn't take Blake off his mind even if he tried. Quite ironically, the next singer crooned one of Miranda's biggest hits, having him feeling more insecure than ever before.

Blake Shelton. A fucking disease is what he was.

Adam really needed this girl on his team. Her voice was beautiful, and he really needed a win to have his spirits perking up again. BOY did he really need a win. He's never started a season on such a downfall like he has this year. When the contestant mentioned that she had the lyrics to 'The House That Built Me' tattooed on her foot, he knew he was done for. Blake had this one in the bag. All he could do was hope for a miracle as he tried to convince her to pick him, to make him feel needed again. He glanced a few times at Blake who continued to stare at the floor, either zoned out or trying to focus on the competition. He wished he would shoot him a glance back. Just. One. Look. That's all he wanted at this point and the fact that he wasn't getting it made him weak as ever.

He took a risk and decided to call the southerner out. "I have a guy three chairs over that I can always talk to about those things. He'll say he won't to try to get you on his team..." he said, hearing the room cheer but more importantly, noticing Blake laughing from his peripheral vision. "But guess what? He will do. Help me whenever I need it." Adam did a good job of not choking up at this point because he could feel the tears burning at the back of his eyes, begging to be released. But no, he needs to stay strong for now. He needs to just do his job as a coach, stay thankful to be a part of one of the most successful talent hunt shows of all time, get paid and go home. He continued to make the pitch which he'll go on to remember as one of his greatest ones of all time, even though he didn't get the artist in the end.

"Cause he loves me. And I love him".

The audience went wild. 

____________________________________________________

They'd wrapped up and Adam was in his trailer grabbing his things, dumping them in his bag. He just wanted to go home and watch a funny movie or something. Just take his mind off the crappy emotions he accumulated. There was a knock on his door. "Come in!" he called out, continuing his packing.

"Adam?"

That voice, that accent - it had become permanently engraved onto his mind, he almost wanted to laugh. He turned around, seeing the taller man close the door. "Hey Blake. What's up? Good job tod-"

"I'm sorry" Blake cut him off instantly.

Adam lay his bottle down, exhaling and finally making eye contact. It was like ice on a wound.

"I think you've noticed how I've been lately and I just wanted to say, it's not you. It's not you at all. I've just been having some problems at the studio and... god, I think I took it out on you and it's one of the stupidest things I've ever done."

"You've been dumber. No worries" Adam joked, but Blake was serious as hell. "Adam please. What you said out there tonight, it just reminded me of how much we've been through together. I can't believe I put all that on the line just by not keeping my emotions together."

Funny he said that since Adam felt like the one who couldn't hold it together right now. He felt the ever so similar block come up in his throat as he tried to talk normally. "Blake, it's fine. No big deal. As l-long as you weren't angry at me..."

That was all he could say before he could feel the waterworks making a comeback. Goddamn it. Why now?

He pretended to be distracted by the packing as he looked down, shoving his water bottle into his bag.

"No, don't do that. Don't look away. Look at me." Blake said, grabbing Adam face to face him. "Oh god, I hurt you baby. I hurt you so bad." He kissed Adam all over as tears rolled down. His temple, his cheeks, his neck... he nuzzled up, whispering in his ear "I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry. You’re my angel, you know that".

He kissed his lips softly and for the longest time, like he was handling brittle, paper thin glass. He may have been, given his boyfriend’s state. "I love you" Blake finally said, echoing his words from before.

Those three damned words set the spark off and Adam went weak, unable to stand without support, sobbing into his chest. He brought his hands up to cover his face while the larger man curled his arms around him, locking him in the embrace he'd missed so much. He was holding up Adam from falling to the floor, feeling the guilt eat him up in realizing how much he'd hurt him for real. "I didn't bring down all your walls for nothing sweetheart. You're the love of my life, I messed up. It didn't mean anything. Didn't mean anything at all" Blake murmured trying to look at Adam's face but the rock star could only hide his face as he cried silently, letting out all the tension he'd built up inside.

They'd moved to the couch before either of them realized it, as Blake rocked him slowly, whispering all his "I love you"s and other typical sweet nothings. He gently massaged the arch of Adam's back, smoothing his hair protectively until his hazel-eyed lover fell asleep in his arms, feeling at home once again.

**Author's Note:**

> Just to be clear, this is a work of FICTION despite the use of actual scenes/quotes from the latest season. I'm only specifying this because I've lately seen many people questioning the seriousness of Adam/Blake's rivalry on the show and trust me, the last thing I want is this story to perpetuate those rumors. 
> 
> It's clear from their tweets (and the adorable new hug from the battles episode!) that they're very much on the friendliest of terms. And just to back it up from someone who was actually present there - sweetshevine.tumblr.com/post/113044201399
> 
> Anyways, I'd love to read your comments. Drop em like it's hot!


End file.
